Today, we went to the pool. Aaaand, I saw a whole lot of this.
Frumpy mom skirts. In fact, while clicking on the image above, after finding it on Google Image, the picture was labeled: momskirt1.gif. The picture was actually linked to an awesome short paragraph on how skirts don't truly hide mom flaws. Check it out here.
During my time at the public pool, I saw the following: (Besides the mom skirts...)
1. Lifeguard with major front wedgie. Akin to the 80's aerobics instructor below. (Minus the boobs.)
2. A trio of women discussing a particularly juicy part of "50 Shades of Grey" while giggling and helping their toddlers down the water slide. Very classy.
3. A (different than the above stated) lifeguard that had a rough go at shaving and left more hairs than she probably wanted on her upper thigh/crotchal region. Lovely.
4. And last, but not least, a handful of chubbawubb kiddos who, if they were the size of normal 8-10 year olds, would have been able to go down the kid slides. But instead, they got kicked off. Sad day. Eat your veggies, little ones.
Also, just a little fun piece of free advice: If you're looking to get a tattoo, hit up a public pool and you'll find a hefty amount of body ink images that you would be wise to avoid.
Sincerely,
Me.
The fact that those women were reading 50 shades of grey is embarrassing enough, but then in public!! I went to a baseball game recently and the woman in front of me was reading it on her iphone. Woof.
ReplyDeleteHey, that Mom skirt looks oddly familiar! YIKES! I WEAR ONE OF THOSE!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA
ReplyDeletehahahahaha. Public pools are great. But awful. They're great because they're awful. We should go to the pool sometime and document our findings. Although, I could go my whole life without seeing a mis-shaved pubic region.
ReplyDeleteAh hah hah, that was awesome. For a minute there I thought that was a picture of you in your new swimsuit, Lauren. Hot! As for the "mom skirts"... come on now... not everyone has a flawless bod like you. I happen to wear running shorts over my swimsuit when I swim. Yep. I'm one of those. :)
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