Sexy Mother.

Dear Diary, 


     Isn't it the best when you and your man are getting fresh when all of the sudden your breast pads sort of flop out of your shirt? Nothing screams sexy like a floppy breast pad. The other night my husband and I were "gettin' close" and I realized that I had to keep my shirt on so that my breast pads would stay in. It had been a couple hours since I fed the babe and she was already in bed for the night, which meant slight engorgement for me, which inevitably leads to leakage. No extra bodily fluids are needed during sexy time. So as I broke the sad news to my husband about having to keep those ta-ta's hid-hid, he asked (out of pure desperation), "Can't you just like...ATHLETIC tape those things to your chest?" Ah, such is a thought of a man. 


Sincerely, 


Me.