Oh, Is That Right?

Dear Diary, 


You know what my husband told me last night? He told me he thinks he could give birth. You know what I did? I LAUGHED. I should probably mention that if I pull one of his nose hairs, or pluck an eyebrow hair, his eyes water up, his nose becomes super itchy and he sort of has a weird spasm-seizure-thing. He proceeded to tell me that he had a big bowel movement once and it caused some cramping up in his back. (So is this "cramping" supposed to be compared to contractions? Nobody gets an epidural for an abnormally large piece of fecal matter exiting the body.) Anyway, I told him that once his bum dilates to a 10, we can talk. 


Sincerely, 


Me.




Post Script: If only we could allow men to experience the things we experience...